Melbourne Father Turns Personal Loss Into Support for Grieving Families

After losing two sons, Melbourne father Nick Olney has established a charity helping grieving parents preserve memories of their babies and access support after neonatal loss.

Melbourne father Nick Olney has turned the devastating loss of his two sons into an effort to support other families experiencing stillbirth and neonatal death. Olney's first son, Harry, died less than two days after being born in 2020. His second son, PJ, died 18 weeks into pregnancy in 2022. The experiences left Olney and his wife, Olga, facing profound grief while trying to find appropriate support. Following Harry's death, a nurse helped the family preserve his hand and footprints. The small imprint became an important keepsake for the family and later became part of Olney's efforts to help other grieving parents. After losing PJ, Olney spent months trying to find a psychologist who could provide appropriate support. He said he struggled to find someone who understood the experience of fathers who had lost children. He subsequently began speaking informally with other grieving fathers. Those conversations eventually led Olney and his wife to establish the charity No Harry to Hold in 2023. The organisation now provides baby imprint kits to neonatal intensive care units. The kits allow parents to preserve hand and footprints and create physical memories of babies who have died. Olney has been travelling around Australia as part of his effort to have the kits available across the country's neonatal intensive care units. During one journey, he carried an imprint of Harry's tiny feet to Cape York, Australia's northernmost point on the mainland. The journey was deeply emotional for Olney because he had originally promised his son that he would show him the world. Instead, he carried Harry's memory with him. The need for specialist bereavement support remains significant. Australian health data indicates that, on average, six babies are stillborn and another two die within 28 days of birth each day. Support services are available across Australia, but access varies significantly between regions. The availability of dedicated bereavement staff is particularly limited outside major metropolitan areas. In North Queensland, a specialist perinatal loss coordinator works with families dealing with the death of a baby. The role includes helping parents create memories and navigate the emotional aftermath of their loss. A survey of more than 100 Australian maternity services found that only about one-quarter had a designated bereavement midwife. Most of those positions were located in major cities. Olney's charity is working to expand access to memory-making resources, including imprint kits, for families around Australia. The initiative also highlights the experience of fathers following the death of a baby. Bereavement services have historically placed significant attention on mothers, while fathers can sometimes focus on supporting their partners rather than seeking help themselves. For Olney, the imprint of Harry's feet has become a lasting reminder of his son and a symbol of why he continues the work. His goal is to ensure other parents receive something tangible to take home after an unimaginable loss, while also making it easier for grieving fathers to find people who understand what they are experiencing.